UNDERSTANDING

Last evening Kay and I entertained one of the very most heterosexual couples who are also residents in the retirement community where we live here in Concord, New Hampshire.

They are quite a bit younger than we are - especially me - as Renata is just about to have her 65th birthday and I'm going to be 80. Age, we've discovered after living here for 5 years, has nothing to do with anything. It's your spirit that determines how young or old you happen to be. But that's not my topic today.

My topic is understanding one another and accepting each other's viewpoint and lifestyle. Renata and Bob personify this outlook. We had a wonderful time together exchanging stories about our children, hobbies and involvements in community life. The best thing about this exchange is everything is really the same whether you're raising children in a heterosexual marriage or in a same-sex partnership. Children need the love and nurturing only their parents can provide. Getting joy and relaxation from the pursuit of a hobby (Renata and I both knit) spans age as well as lifestyle choices. Community involvement is a personal choice but I've discovered if you put yourself "out there" people are drawn to you much more than if you are reclusive. Speculation runs rampant if same-sex couples tuck themselves away from the potential of making new friends and having the joy of belonging.

Renata and Bob are a couple who have displayed their affection for us from the get-go. It's a mutual thing because each couple has something to offer the other. What a waste it would be if we hadn't met in the first place, pursued becoming friends and discovering all the similarities we have.

Who says Gay relationships are all about what goes on in the bedroom?