I was a widow with two children when Kay and I met and moved in together 28 years ago. My son, who I knew was Gay almost before he did, was a tormented and bullied teenager. My daughter, gifted with tremendous reasoning powers as well as a photographic mind, needed a scholastic discipline that would challenge her. When Kay opened her home in Durham, NH to us in 1980, I jumped at the opportunity to not only be with the woman I had come to love but also to find a good school for my kids.
The school was perfect for my daughter and offered opportunities that didn't exist in the school we'd left behind. My son's effeminacy was accepted and his involvement in the music programs was rewarding for him.
I had difficulties being a single mother - even though I always had Kay's support. It was the biggest and loneliest job I ever had and I came very close to failing both of my children. My son, because he got into drugs and alcohol and my daughter because she tried so hard to be perfect so I wouldn't have to worry about her. I needed counseling but not as much as they both did.
Through some miracle and the result of the mysterious way God works, we all survived what could have been one tragedy heaped upon another and another and another.
I read in the paper this morning about sex among today's teenagers even before they're sixteen! Oral sex isn't considered "sex" to them but still it will escalate from there and sexually transmitted diseases will hit them hard. How can we bring kids back to childhood? What can be done to help parents with what must be an overwhelming moral issue with which to wrestle?
I feel fortunate that the problems I had were overcome and my kids turned out as well as they could in spite of the dangers having only one parent presented to them. Today, they welcome the idea of having two mothers and are proud of us in our alternative lifestyle, our domestic partnership and our gay relationship. I am blessed in every way imaginable.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
THE CANDIDATE DILEMMA
Have you heard about the voter who was suffering from E.D.? "Yes", he said. "I've got Electile Dysfunction....I can't get aroused by any of the candidates". I think that's so perfect and such a good description of the way I feel.
I'm not sure about any of them and as each new day goes by and Clinton and Obama dredge up more mud to sling, I get more uncertain. My question to myself is, am I being disloyal to my gender if I don't vote for Hillary? Is it wrong to vote by Gender? On the other hand, are African-American voters favoring Obama because of his skin color? It's the same conundrum, right?
Perhaps, as our local paper said today McCain's recent "senior moments" have become velcroed to everything he now says. But, not so fast, what about Hillary's moment when she claimed she dodged bullets in Bosnia....or Obama who spoke about a Life Magazine article that never actually appeared.
It's become a question of how old, old is as opposed to how black, black is; and how female, a female is. McCain looks good to me but percentage-wise at my age I'm in the lower percentile of voters who believe his age of 71 really matters even though 70 is the new 60. I couldn't run any sort of organization let alone a country, but I'm 79.
I wish they'd run a Gay individual then there'd be no question of who would get my vote because I'd know that person was more than qualified simply because of all he or she had to overcome to even be a candidate...or would "don't ask, don't tell" be an issue.
This is one-half of your favorite same-sex couple signing off!!
I'm not sure about any of them and as each new day goes by and Clinton and Obama dredge up more mud to sling, I get more uncertain. My question to myself is, am I being disloyal to my gender if I don't vote for Hillary? Is it wrong to vote by Gender? On the other hand, are African-American voters favoring Obama because of his skin color? It's the same conundrum, right?
Perhaps, as our local paper said today McCain's recent "senior moments" have become velcroed to everything he now says. But, not so fast, what about Hillary's moment when she claimed she dodged bullets in Bosnia....or Obama who spoke about a Life Magazine article that never actually appeared.
It's become a question of how old, old is as opposed to how black, black is; and how female, a female is. McCain looks good to me but percentage-wise at my age I'm in the lower percentile of voters who believe his age of 71 really matters even though 70 is the new 60. I couldn't run any sort of organization let alone a country, but I'm 79.
I wish they'd run a Gay individual then there'd be no question of who would get my vote because I'd know that person was more than qualified simply because of all he or she had to overcome to even be a candidate...or would "don't ask, don't tell" be an issue.
This is one-half of your favorite same-sex couple signing off!!
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
WHAT'S IN VOGUE?
If any of our readers happened to witness the brouhaha on the Today Show this morning over the two people featured on the cover of the latest issue of Vogue, you have learned a bit about discrimination and the hue and cry that can raise its ugly head over something "different".
Those of us who were in the "closet" for decades, then had the nerve to step out on "the road less taken", have experienced the inevitable experience of hearing and seeing the behind-the-hand smirks and the whispers.
The cover of Vogue features a massive African-American basketball player and a gorgeous white model. He does look kind of ferocious but she is still gorgeous in spite of it. The crux of the Today Show segment was the racial issue that a black man and a white woman together brings to mind - they even went so far as to compare the cover to King Kong with the shrieking Fay Wray in his fist while he clings to the Empire State Building!!
I wonder if any same-sex couples have ever been featured on Vogue? Does any one know? Because if that is the next step in the editors' minds, those of us in gay relationships need to be prepared. I was appalled at the reaction to the current Vogue cover - there was nothing evil intended nor did it come anywhere close to disgusting me - what gives??
Those of us who were in the "closet" for decades, then had the nerve to step out on "the road less taken", have experienced the inevitable experience of hearing and seeing the behind-the-hand smirks and the whispers.
The cover of Vogue features a massive African-American basketball player and a gorgeous white model. He does look kind of ferocious but she is still gorgeous in spite of it. The crux of the Today Show segment was the racial issue that a black man and a white woman together brings to mind - they even went so far as to compare the cover to King Kong with the shrieking Fay Wray in his fist while he clings to the Empire State Building!!
I wonder if any same-sex couples have ever been featured on Vogue? Does any one know? Because if that is the next step in the editors' minds, those of us in gay relationships need to be prepared. I was appalled at the reaction to the current Vogue cover - there was nothing evil intended nor did it come anywhere close to disgusting me - what gives??
Monday, March 24, 2008
RED SOX
Since the Patriots' last ugly game, Kay and I have endured a personal sports moratorium! We don't like either basketball or ice hockey (unless it's the UNH Women's Ice Hockey). So we've had to content ourselves with the Men's PGA and Tiger Woods.
But now, the Red Sox are back on the scene - well not exactly since they're playing their opener in Tokyo but at least it's a team we love and will follow closely from now until the World Series. As a same-sex couple do we stick out when we hang our Red Sox banner outside our apartment where we live? Probably, but that doesn't bother us one bit because where we live in Concord, New Hampshire we're accepted everywhere we go and it's a good feeling.
Our book, "Sisters by Heart", is in the community library here and our program, based on the book which we put on for potential new residents, shows the diversity that exists here. It's a popular program with newcomers and old time residents alike.
For those over 62 who are in an alternative lifestyle, you should visit Havenwood-Heritage Heights.
But now, the Red Sox are back on the scene - well not exactly since they're playing their opener in Tokyo but at least it's a team we love and will follow closely from now until the World Series. As a same-sex couple do we stick out when we hang our Red Sox banner outside our apartment where we live? Probably, but that doesn't bother us one bit because where we live in Concord, New Hampshire we're accepted everywhere we go and it's a good feeling.
Our book, "Sisters by Heart", is in the community library here and our program, based on the book which we put on for potential new residents, shows the diversity that exists here. It's a popular program with newcomers and old time residents alike.
For those over 62 who are in an alternative lifestyle, you should visit Havenwood-Heritage Heights.
Friday, March 21, 2008
HAPPY EASTER
Kay and I will be attending the 8 a.m. service at our church here in Concord. Then we'll have dinner with family and friends in the central dining room here at Heritage Heights. There will be 8 of us at the table and although we made all the arrangements and reserved the table, we are the only same-sex couple - for a matter of fact, we'll be the only Gay or Lesbian people at our table, whether in a gay relationship or single.
This is a distinct sign of our times - we're accepted for what we are - two outrageous older women living in a diverse community where everyone accepts each other.
On the Easter Sunday we feel the blessings of the Resurrection we're about to celebrate.
This is a distinct sign of our times - we're accepted for what we are - two outrageous older women living in a diverse community where everyone accepts each other.
On the Easter Sunday we feel the blessings of the Resurrection we're about to celebrate.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
SISTERS BY HEART
We just shipped off another copy of our gay relationship book, "Sisters by Heart". The order came to us through Amazon.Com and we thank whoever it was "out there" who ordered it. We know you'll get a laugh or two and you might shed a tear or two as well.
Kay and I had fun living the background adventures in the book but we also had some tense moments that you need to read between the lines to discover. In the Reflections section at the end of each chapter you'll find a look inside what it's like to be part of a same-sex couple. Happy reading and keep the orders coming in!
I also wanted to talk more about the movie, "For the Bible Tells Me So". Because of the lack of understanding between two sets of parents and their Gay or Lesbian children, one child contemplated suicide and had even gone so far as to purchase a gun for that purpose. The other child successfully hung herself using her dogs collar and leash. The movie's producer chose to show the picture of this dead young woman which made the tears of the theater audience very apparent. But take heart - the movie has a basically happy ending and emphasizes the great need for the work PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) does in those living in alternate lifestyles.
Kay and I had fun living the background adventures in the book but we also had some tense moments that you need to read between the lines to discover. In the Reflections section at the end of each chapter you'll find a look inside what it's like to be part of a same-sex couple. Happy reading and keep the orders coming in!
I also wanted to talk more about the movie, "For the Bible Tells Me So". Because of the lack of understanding between two sets of parents and their Gay or Lesbian children, one child contemplated suicide and had even gone so far as to purchase a gun for that purpose. The other child successfully hung herself using her dogs collar and leash. The movie's producer chose to show the picture of this dead young woman which made the tears of the theater audience very apparent. But take heart - the movie has a basically happy ending and emphasizes the great need for the work PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) does in those living in alternate lifestyles.
Monday, March 17, 2008
A MUST-SEE MOVIE
Last evening Kay and I went to the movie, "For the Bible Tells Me So". It's a story about four families each with a Gay or Lesbian child - how the family handles the situation but, more importantly, how they applied what they believe the Bible tells them about homosexuality.
One family's son marries but realizes he's not being honest with his wife, children and himself and he leaves the marriage and eventually rises to become the Episcopal Bishop of the Diocese of New Hampshire.
Another family's son is now a student at Harvard Divinity School. Richard Gebhart's daughter is featured as is the mother of a Lesbian who ends up committing suicide because her mother tells her she no longer accepts her as her daughter.
All through the show there are Bible-thumping Gerry Falwall-types and on the opposing side there are pastors and Bible scholars who explain what the Bible is really trying to say.
If this movie comes to a theater anywhere near where you live and you are in an alternative lifestyle, in a domestic partnership or gay relationship DO NOT MISS IT.
One family's son marries but realizes he's not being honest with his wife, children and himself and he leaves the marriage and eventually rises to become the Episcopal Bishop of the Diocese of New Hampshire.
Another family's son is now a student at Harvard Divinity School. Richard Gebhart's daughter is featured as is the mother of a Lesbian who ends up committing suicide because her mother tells her she no longer accepts her as her daughter.
All through the show there are Bible-thumping Gerry Falwall-types and on the opposing side there are pastors and Bible scholars who explain what the Bible is really trying to say.
If this movie comes to a theater anywhere near where you live and you are in an alternative lifestyle, in a domestic partnership or gay relationship DO NOT MISS IT.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
PALM SUNDAY
Today has always seemed to me like a day of great triumph even though, as the hymn says, Jesus "rides forth to die". I love that hymn and look forward to singing it every year on Palm Sunday. That and bringing home palms to be braided and kept over the living room mirror until they are turned into ashes for the beginning of Lent next year.
My grandmother was a student of the Bible and taught Bible Studies in my grandfather's church in Clinton, Massachusetts. When I was a child, she taught me the Old Testament stories and we would act out ones such as Miriam finding moses floating down the river and rescuing him from the bulrushes. I loved the stories of Jesus when he was a little boy and would amaze people with his profound statements and knowledge.
I'm sure there are many folks in gay relationships who will have nothing to do with the Bible or any religion that centers on God and Jesus Christ. There are just as many who are as close to their traditional beliefs as ever. Some even more so.
This afternoon we're going to see "The Bible Tells Me So" with discussions afterwards by Bishop Gene Robinson and other leaders who have a same-sex partnership following. I'll report more on this but in the meantime, I wish all our Blog visitors as blessed Palm Sunday.
My grandmother was a student of the Bible and taught Bible Studies in my grandfather's church in Clinton, Massachusetts. When I was a child, she taught me the Old Testament stories and we would act out ones such as Miriam finding moses floating down the river and rescuing him from the bulrushes. I loved the stories of Jesus when he was a little boy and would amaze people with his profound statements and knowledge.
I'm sure there are many folks in gay relationships who will have nothing to do with the Bible or any religion that centers on God and Jesus Christ. There are just as many who are as close to their traditional beliefs as ever. Some even more so.
This afternoon we're going to see "The Bible Tells Me So" with discussions afterwards by Bishop Gene Robinson and other leaders who have a same-sex partnership following. I'll report more on this but in the meantime, I wish all our Blog visitors as blessed Palm Sunday.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
GOOD MORNING
One of the best things about being in a same-sex partnership is that neither of us feels threatened! I spent 15 years with an abusive husband and felt threatened almost every day.
It is such a feeling of delightful and blessed peace to be in the relationship I have with Kay - sure we argue but that's a healthy component of any relationship. We'd be pretty boring people if we didn't have some different opinions on things. We talk through major decisions and weigh the pros and cons and we listen to each other's point of view.
In our gay relationship book, "Sisters by Heart", we talk about the importance of laughter. We laugh a lot - at each other, at ourselves and the best is laughing together!!
It is such a feeling of delightful and blessed peace to be in the relationship I have with Kay - sure we argue but that's a healthy component of any relationship. We'd be pretty boring people if we didn't have some different opinions on things. We talk through major decisions and weigh the pros and cons and we listen to each other's point of view.
In our gay relationship book, "Sisters by Heart", we talk about the importance of laughter. We laugh a lot - at each other, at ourselves and the best is laughing together!!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
UNDERSTANDING
Last evening Kay and I entertained one of the very most heterosexual couples who are also residents in the retirement community where we live here in Concord, New Hampshire.
They are quite a bit younger than we are - especially me - as Renata is just about to have her 65th birthday and I'm going to be 80. Age, we've discovered after living here for 5 years, has nothing to do with anything. It's your spirit that determines how young or old you happen to be. But that's not my topic today.
My topic is understanding one another and accepting each other's viewpoint and lifestyle. Renata and Bob personify this outlook. We had a wonderful time together exchanging stories about our children, hobbies and involvements in community life. The best thing about this exchange is everything is really the same whether you're raising children in a heterosexual marriage or in a same-sex partnership. Children need the love and nurturing only their parents can provide. Getting joy and relaxation from the pursuit of a hobby (Renata and I both knit) spans age as well as lifestyle choices. Community involvement is a personal choice but I've discovered if you put yourself "out there" people are drawn to you much more than if you are reclusive. Speculation runs rampant if same-sex couples tuck themselves away from the potential of making new friends and having the joy of belonging.
Renata and Bob are a couple who have displayed their affection for us from the get-go. It's a mutual thing because each couple has something to offer the other. What a waste it would be if we hadn't met in the first place, pursued becoming friends and discovering all the similarities we have.
Who says Gay relationships are all about what goes on in the bedroom?
They are quite a bit younger than we are - especially me - as Renata is just about to have her 65th birthday and I'm going to be 80. Age, we've discovered after living here for 5 years, has nothing to do with anything. It's your spirit that determines how young or old you happen to be. But that's not my topic today.
My topic is understanding one another and accepting each other's viewpoint and lifestyle. Renata and Bob personify this outlook. We had a wonderful time together exchanging stories about our children, hobbies and involvements in community life. The best thing about this exchange is everything is really the same whether you're raising children in a heterosexual marriage or in a same-sex partnership. Children need the love and nurturing only their parents can provide. Getting joy and relaxation from the pursuit of a hobby (Renata and I both knit) spans age as well as lifestyle choices. Community involvement is a personal choice but I've discovered if you put yourself "out there" people are drawn to you much more than if you are reclusive. Speculation runs rampant if same-sex couples tuck themselves away from the potential of making new friends and having the joy of belonging.
Renata and Bob are a couple who have displayed their affection for us from the get-go. It's a mutual thing because each couple has something to offer the other. What a waste it would be if we hadn't met in the first place, pursued becoming friends and discovering all the similarities we have.
Who says Gay relationships are all about what goes on in the bedroom?
Sunday, March 9, 2008
I BELIEVE.......
.......either you control your attitude or it controls you!! And that's so true when one marches to a different drummer.
It's not as noticeable today but I can remember dreadful arguments that almost came to blows back in the 1940's about societal issues involving Queers. Of course it never stopped there - it spread to include every other ethnic group imaginable.
We're each responsible for our own beliefs. The most important part about our beliefs is that they're ours and should not be foisted off on others. Our attitude is our attitude and thank God we have the freedom to be free enough to think for ourselves.
One week in a same-sex partnership trying to keep a foot in the Gay and the Straight worlds is proof of that. Alternative lifestyles are just that - a choice to take the alternate path.
It's not as noticeable today but I can remember dreadful arguments that almost came to blows back in the 1940's about societal issues involving Queers. Of course it never stopped there - it spread to include every other ethnic group imaginable.
We're each responsible for our own beliefs. The most important part about our beliefs is that they're ours and should not be foisted off on others. Our attitude is our attitude and thank God we have the freedom to be free enough to think for ourselves.
One week in a same-sex partnership trying to keep a foot in the Gay and the Straight worlds is proof of that. Alternative lifestyles are just that - a choice to take the alternate path.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
GOOD MORNING
Where I live, here in Concord, New Hampshire, same-sex couples are accepted and looked on as equals in everyday life and in most social circles. Of course, we're more comfortable in some circles than in others. But an unusual example of this is a good woman friend who was widowed before she moved into our community. She's a great gal, with lots of interests about which she's very enthusiastic. But she'd be the first to agree with me that she isn't comfortable going places without a male escort. And that includes mostly Gay/Lesbian gatherings.
Naturally, single women living alone far outnumber single males. So you would think the competition for an escort would run quite high. Not so! Singles mix beautifully and the amazing thing is those in alternative lifestyles mix right in as well.
It's quite remarkable and far removed from the town from where Kay and I moved. A mill town primarily at its beginning, it has a small-minded mentality and our eyes were truly opened when we moved to Concord and saw first-hand what a difference there was in acceptance.
Moral - if you're looking for a retirement town and are in an alternative lifestyle, consider joining us here in Concord, New Hampshire. We'd love to have you.
Naturally, single women living alone far outnumber single males. So you would think the competition for an escort would run quite high. Not so! Singles mix beautifully and the amazing thing is those in alternative lifestyles mix right in as well.
It's quite remarkable and far removed from the town from where Kay and I moved. A mill town primarily at its beginning, it has a small-minded mentality and our eyes were truly opened when we moved to Concord and saw first-hand what a difference there was in acceptance.
Moral - if you're looking for a retirement town and are in an alternative lifestyle, consider joining us here in Concord, New Hampshire. We'd love to have you.
Friday, March 7, 2008
STRETCHING MY DOLLARS
I retired from the University of New Hampshire the day after I celebrated my 60th birthday. My plan was to write full time - a dream I'd had for decades. Not being a detail person, I assumed my income would stretch to meet my needs except I forgot the importance of health insurance and therein was a huge problem. It quickly became apparent I needed to work at least part-time until Medicare kicked in five years hence. So I hired back on at the university as a "temp". I knew the automated financial system backwards and forwards because I'd been using it before retirement. It turned out I was a valuable asset and was paid top dollar to step into a variety of campus departments to help out during maternity leaves and other short term absences.
Then came the day I was assigned to ROTC Administration. This is an adjunct department for student reserve officer training. Lots of students - male and female - use ROTC as a way to finance their college education and pay the government back by serving in the Reserves - at UNH this could be the Army or Air Force Reserves.
The colonel in charge of the Army ROTC, to whom I reported, was a stickler: there was the Army way and then there was the Army way. Each time he approached my desk I felt the urge to jump from my chair and snap off a salute. Where was the informality of academe I had come to cherish?
Fortunately the woman I was subbing for had her baby sooner than expected and I was off the hook. At a farewell breakfast given for me, I was presented with a hooded sweatshirt with A-R-M-Y emblazoned across the front. I have cherished that jacket for years - it's reminder of my greatest battle.
Is that entirely true, I wonder? I've certainly had some major skirmishes. Some were to do with sticking up for my rights as part of a same-sex couple and the emotional turmoil that used to rage inside of me when people would say, "I don't want any of those dirty people coming into our church."
What were they thinking? These were battle wounds that will be with me always.
The most important result of those times is that I have learned to hold my head high, live my life openly and honestly, thank God for all his many blessings and respect and love the domestic partnership I have with Kay.
Then came the day I was assigned to ROTC Administration. This is an adjunct department for student reserve officer training. Lots of students - male and female - use ROTC as a way to finance their college education and pay the government back by serving in the Reserves - at UNH this could be the Army or Air Force Reserves.
The colonel in charge of the Army ROTC, to whom I reported, was a stickler: there was the Army way and then there was the Army way. Each time he approached my desk I felt the urge to jump from my chair and snap off a salute. Where was the informality of academe I had come to cherish?
Fortunately the woman I was subbing for had her baby sooner than expected and I was off the hook. At a farewell breakfast given for me, I was presented with a hooded sweatshirt with A-R-M-Y emblazoned across the front. I have cherished that jacket for years - it's reminder of my greatest battle.
Is that entirely true, I wonder? I've certainly had some major skirmishes. Some were to do with sticking up for my rights as part of a same-sex couple and the emotional turmoil that used to rage inside of me when people would say, "I don't want any of those dirty people coming into our church."
What were they thinking? These were battle wounds that will be with me always.
The most important result of those times is that I have learned to hold my head high, live my life openly and honestly, thank God for all his many blessings and respect and love the domestic partnership I have with Kay.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
ASTOUNDING TECHNOLOGY
As I've said before, when I write my Blog entries, I have no idea where my words fall....it's like the old question if a tree falls in the forest and there's no one there, does it still make a sound? Well, imagine our surprise when we received a Google Alert that 40 of our Blog entries had indeed reached the eyes of today's technology.
Please copy and paste http://technorati.com/blogs/www.kalmpublishing.com and see what I mean. And that's just the tip of the old ice berg I'm told. Who knew all this was "out there"?
The world of books about gay relationships, gay relationships is getting friendlier each day. And even my entries about our editing services made the big time.
Please copy and paste http://technorati.com/blogs/www.kalmpublishing.com and see what I mean. And that's just the tip of the old ice berg I'm told. Who knew all this was "out there"?
The world of books about gay relationships, gay relationships is getting friendlier each day. And even my entries about our editing services made the big time.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
LETTING OUT MY SOUL
Someone once said, "writing lets out the soul". I believe it and the more I make Blog entries, it becomes more clear just why I enjoy it so much - it's because my words are indeed the window to my inner being.
I've saved all my writings since I was in second grade - well, not all of them, just the ones of which I was most proud. My first attempt at poetry was this written when I was 7. Titled, "Me".
I'm quite fat,
But I'm glad I'm not flat,
For if I were that,
There'd be nothing at all,
But a little round ball
That's all!
I'm so much of a ball,
That I can't bend at all.
I can't tie my shoes
Or say my two - twos
'Cause I'm such a round ball,
That's all!
Is that letting out my soul, or what? It seems obvious to me now that I was sending out an SOS. Help me to not be fat, I was saying. Looking back at pictures of me when I was 7, I don't look fat but I was chunky around the middle. I was also always the tallest girl in my class which also may have prompted the poem. Who knows and it's all behind me now anyway.
Now, in my 80th year, those things that are outward and visible are so minor compared to what's inside. I am at peace. I've finally gotten to know who I am. I have an alternative lifestyle, I have a same-sex partner and we are partners in life. Amen.
I've saved all my writings since I was in second grade - well, not all of them, just the ones of which I was most proud. My first attempt at poetry was this written when I was 7. Titled, "Me".
I'm quite fat,
But I'm glad I'm not flat,
For if I were that,
There'd be nothing at all,
But a little round ball
That's all!
I'm so much of a ball,
That I can't bend at all.
I can't tie my shoes
Or say my two - twos
'Cause I'm such a round ball,
That's all!
Is that letting out my soul, or what? It seems obvious to me now that I was sending out an SOS. Help me to not be fat, I was saying. Looking back at pictures of me when I was 7, I don't look fat but I was chunky around the middle. I was also always the tallest girl in my class which also may have prompted the poem. Who knows and it's all behind me now anyway.
Now, in my 80th year, those things that are outward and visible are so minor compared to what's inside. I am at peace. I've finally gotten to know who I am. I have an alternative lifestyle, I have a same-sex partner and we are partners in life. Amen.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
GAY RELATIONSHIP BOOKS
Today is Sunday. It's a favorite day and it's the Lord's Day. It's also the morning I fix the special scrambled eggs that Kay loves. Rosey loves them just as much!! The recipe for the eggs is in "Sisters by Heart" under "Champagne Breakfast for Two". In summers in the past, we used to have breakfast out on the deck at the cabin overlooking the woods, and a small piece of Laurel Lake that could be seen through the enormous trees that just about obliterated the view I'd paid dearly to have carved out. All got overgrown very quickly.
Kay and I really enjoy a glass of champagne - with a little bit of Angostura Bitters shaken into the bottom of the glass before pouring the bubbly. The bitters add a touch of exotic depth to the champagne and, although it contains 11% alcohol, it doesn't seem to increase the potency of the drink. However, a post-breakfast nap was never out of the question!!
In the 25 years I spent in heterosexual marriages, I never experienced the total joy, spirituality and sense of peace I've had for the past 28 years with Kay. As partners in life, we've shared as many ups and downs as any other couple with two children - especially the two teenagers I introduced into Kay's life back in 1980. There were times I thought my sanity was in question but the steady rock that Kay provided for me, stood fast and somehow we survived with our spirits in tact.
There are so many labels for our relationship - domestic partnership and same-sex couple to name two. At the end of our Civil Union we were pronounced Partners in Life. And that's what we are.
Kay and I really enjoy a glass of champagne - with a little bit of Angostura Bitters shaken into the bottom of the glass before pouring the bubbly. The bitters add a touch of exotic depth to the champagne and, although it contains 11% alcohol, it doesn't seem to increase the potency of the drink. However, a post-breakfast nap was never out of the question!!
In the 25 years I spent in heterosexual marriages, I never experienced the total joy, spirituality and sense of peace I've had for the past 28 years with Kay. As partners in life, we've shared as many ups and downs as any other couple with two children - especially the two teenagers I introduced into Kay's life back in 1980. There were times I thought my sanity was in question but the steady rock that Kay provided for me, stood fast and somehow we survived with our spirits in tact.
There are so many labels for our relationship - domestic partnership and same-sex couple to name two. At the end of our Civil Union we were pronounced Partners in Life. And that's what we are.
Saturday, March 1, 2008
SISTERS BY HEART
It's Saturday, March 1, and the snow is coming down in torrents. We've already had 6 inches with 3 more predicted. Kay has been out shoveling Rosey's little igloo tunnel so he can get out to do his "business". I can hear the sidewalk Bobcat plows in the distance.
Day before yesterday our Comcast email decided to let us down and it had to have been the most frustrating experience. Fortunately we had AOL as a back-up but it's not the same and I look forward to having Comcast back.
Since our Civil Union, Kay and I have enjoyed a feeling of new respect - not only for each other that we took this momentous step at our ages - but because we sense our friends and neighbors looking at us with new eyes. Is this a subliminal message that's being sent our way telling us we've "arrived"; or are we reading things into folks' reaction to us that isn't really there?
We've always been very subtle about our love for each other - not blatant at all. The days of flamboyance for those in gay relationships is hopefully a thing of the past. It is important for those in a domestic partnership to respect as well as love each other and to have the respect and genuine caring of their peers, friends and community.
Our book, "Sisters by Heart", is a prime example of an alternative lifestyle. Click on the excerpt of Chapter One on our website to see what I mean.
We've always been very subtle about our love for each other - not blatant at all. The days of flamboyance for those in gay relationships is hopefully a thing of the past. It is important for those in a domestic partnership to respect as well as love each other and to have the respect and genuine caring of their peers, friends and community.
Our book, "Sisters by Heart", is a prime example of an alternative lifestyle. Click on the excerpt of Chapter One on our website to see what I mean.
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