Two Uniques Yankees

Before our first book was published we asked each other, "What are we going to call ourselves as publishers?" We tossed around several choices but settled on KALM, as much because it combined our initials as the reminder to keep "CALM" at all costs.

Humor inspired Sisters by Heart - Partners in Aging. After the crises and the near catastrophes, when the shouting died away, there was the ability to laugh - together, at ourselves and certainly at one another.

Humor has eased the load, lightened the moments and turned our wrinkles upside down.

Without a doubt, the reservoir of adrenaline that has built up in us is the result of the fun and satisfaction we have derived in almost thirty years of applying our individual talents to a common goal.

Life has to have meaning. Being important to each other is just one of the ways we bring meaning to our lives. We have found serenity and great contentment in the challenges and pleasures we have shared.

With age has come wisdom and integrity and the ability to speak our minds. It's no longer a secret that we live for each other.

As a result of out self-publishing experiences we developed a booklet called How to Build A Book - Produce, Publish and Promote Your Written Work. We sell these for $3, plus postage. Enter a comment into our Blog.

Reflections from Sisters by Heart

As I wrote "Sisters by Heart - Partners in Aging" I ended each chapter with a "reflection". These turned out to be a subtle look at the love Kay and I shared.

Chapter One Reflection - Coming Together. Over the years Kay and I have frequently exchanged thoughts about the early days when we first met - when the greens of growth and understanding first began to take root. She had told me about the hurt and mental suffering she'd endured when her longtime partner abandoned the life they'd shared together. "I was so angry with myself for not seeing it coming I punched my fist into the wall, " she said. "The greatest difficulty was working with her in the same department".

I, on the other hand, had a background of two marriages spread over twenty-five years. One ending in divorce, the second in widowhood. Kay and I were similarly bruised even though each of us carried a different sort of emotional baggage. As a result, our journey together was one of support and strength for each other.

It was then we became sisters by heart.

Chapter Two Reflection - Relocating. Inanimate things put in a box and transported one hundred miles away, then taken out and arranged on new shelves and in new drawers, takes nothing away from them. They have no soft centers; they are inanimate.

A person similarly transported has more to cope with. The effect on the human spirit, psyche and sensitivity is profound as one struggles to fit one's square being into the round hole of a new environment.

I said to Kay, "We have no shared memories or bedrock to anchor us during this emotional upheaval we're going through. Help me."

I reached out. Her hand was there. It still is.

Reckless Abandon Cookery

There are 41 unusual recipes, and some that border on sexy, in our book, "Sisters by Heart". To be sure some are pretty mundane such as, fish chowder, Mary Lou's meat loaf and a potluck supper main dish but still there's an important intimacy about food. In much the same way that Feng Shui plays a vital role in the arrangement and selection of home furnishings, sensuality is central to menus and meal preparation.

When we first met, picnics were a big part of our lives. In winter we continued the picnics sitting on pillows on the living room floor around the coffee table.

Kay and I, like most New Englanders, are food-oriented people, discussing what to have for dinner while we're still eating breakfast.

Even today we're apt to make a ceremony of our meals, depending on the entree. One is never too old for dinner by candlelight; on the other hand, supper on TV tables in the living room can be just as grand.

Here are three of our favorite recipes for you to try...remember sexy is the key ingredient!!

ORIENTAL CHICKEN WINGS - This recipe, served by candlelight, brings out not only the Chinese flavor, but is the essence of the sensual aspects of a meal. After all, is there anything sexier than eating with your fingers and sucking the meat off the bone?

1 Cup lite Soy Sauce 1/4 Cup Sesame oil 1/4 Cup dark brown sugar
1/4 Cup vegetable oil 2 pounds chicken wings
2- one gallon food storage bags, doubled, and a twisty
Cut off wing tips and discard. Wash wings and pat dry. In a glass bowl, mix all sauce ingredients. Put wings in the doubled bags; pour in the sauce. Refrigerate all day. Turn bag twice to distribute sauce thoroughly. Put wings and 1/2 cup of sauce in a 13x9 pan. Cook one hour at 350.

FRYING PAN STEAK FOR TWO - This is steak at its sexiest - a new twist on the way mother used to fry it. Great with a salad and a baked potato topped with guacamole.

2 Delmonico steaks (about 3/4 inches thick) 1 Tblsp. McCormick's steak seasoning
2 Tblsp. brandy, whiskey or apple juice 1 Tblsp. Worcestershire sauce
1 Tblsp. butter 1 Tblsp. vegetable oil
Heat butter and oil in large (12-inch) non-stick skillet on medium heat. Rub one-half of the seasoning well into one side of the steaks; put them in the skillet seasoning side down; rub remainder of seasoning in top of steaks. Cook 5 minutes per side for medium. Remove to warmed plates. Add brandy and Worcestershire sauce to skillet; stir and simmer 30 seconds. Pour over the steaks and savor the eating!

SUNRISE CHAMPAGNE BREAKFAST - Sunday mornings were a time to relax and be good to myself. When Kay became a partner in my life, she immediately embraced the champagne tradition. Serve this meal outside on a deck where you can toast the sunrise or in front of a warm fire on chilly mornings.
Champagne Cocktail - 3 healthy shakes of Angostura bitters and 3 ounces of a good champagne. I use a champagne saucer. I know the flutes contain the bubbles and freshness longer, but there's something more glamorous about the way one holds a saucer as opposed to a flute.
Scrambled Eggs Parmesan - Whisk together the following - 4 eggs, 1 Tblsp. skim milk per egg, 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese, 1/2 tsp. garlic powder, grated fresh black pepper to taste. Scramble in pan sprayed with PAM.

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As our years advanced and our time together grew longer, I wondered if spilling soup down my front was an aging thing. Kay teased and said I should use a bib.

We were in a restaurant one evening and watched a woman at the next table remove an oilcloth packet from her purse and place it next to her fork.

When her meal was served, she shook out the piece of oilcloth and placed it around her neck. Kay gave me a kick under the table and mouthed the word, "Bib".

The Strength of Women

As we have said repeatedly in Sisters by Heart, Kay and I respect the crones within us - they are the keepers of our intellect and, at our ages, have endowed us with the right to speak out.

Now that I'm approaching 80, suddenly I've discovered it's great to age! I feel a new empowerment. We have a bright purple bumper sticker on our car that says, "Outrageous Older Woman". That's what being older is all about - it's a time to be outrageous, feisty and most of all it's an entitlement to say what's on our minds.

We were born in the 1920's and along with other women our ages, have risen out of subservient positions in a patriarchal society. Women play a significant and independent role in the pesent and will continue to be defined in ways Kay and I could only imagine.

I spent 25 married years biting my tongue because I thought that was the way a wife was supposed to behave. When my second marriage ended, through the love and support of strong women I learned the importance of liking myself and making myself happy. I searched deep inside myself and made the decision to step out on the road less traveled which is where Kay and I met.

I received no ESP that my life would change forever once this woman crossed my threshold. She was to become the Gibraltar in my life, my partner and cohort in over two decades of challenges that would reverse the sand in the hour glass. Although our chronological ages would stubbornly advance, with each new adventure we shed more of the "fear of trying" until ultimately our minds and bodies fed on - and drew vigor from - our endeavors.

Aging is like driving a car: it seems you're just doing 30, then you're pushing 40 and suddenly before you can hit the brakes, you're at 60.

Sisters by Heart Friendship Fabric

In our book, Sisters by Heart - Partners in Aging, we talk about the first esoteric experience we shared almost three decades ago was a rainbow. For us that arc of colors symbolized God's pleasure with the budding of our same-sex relationship.

The rainbow also inspired the colors in our Friendship Fabric which is part of the book's prologue and which we have worked into actual fabric book marks that are given with each book that we sell.

SISTERS BY HEART FRIENDSHIP FABRIC

The warm pastels of caring

The shadowy darkness of crisis and disagreement
The brilliant gold of shared sunrises
The greens of growth and understanding
The purples of risk-taking
The reds of passion
The blues of serenity found under God's Heaven and beside His still waters
The earth tones of peace and contentment
The knowledge that rather than wither on the vine in our seventies,
we are ripening into springtimes still to be shared

Two Unique Yankees

Affection is a basic human need that persists throughout one's life. Kay and I hug each other often - it sees us through good times and bad.

Our book, Sisters by Heart, not only talks about our love and affection for one another, but it also chronicles how we met, our lives together, our adventures and mis-adventures but most importantly it talks about ways we've looked out for each other for almost three decades.

In recent years, we've put ourselves "out there" to work for diversity, equal rights and the New Hampshire Freedom to Marry Coalition although, truthfully, we never thought New Hampshire would legalize Civil Unions or Marriages in our lifetime - we're both closing in on our 80th birthdays!

But, dreams do come true - on January 1, 2008 NH Civil Unions will be legal in our state and we'll be applying for our CU License...best of all, we'll have no problem meeting the age requirement!!

Sister by Heart - Partners in Aging

We recently recorded a short podcast interview about our book and speaking program. You can listen to the five minute podcast interview here.